Moist and Meaty

First, let’s get something straight: I don’t have any problems with men who sew, knit, or create any articles of clothing utilizing fibers or whatnot. I’m very pro-clothing, as without it, we’d all be nude… and while that sounds like a good idea at times – there are a lot of people out there who I DON’T want to see crouching down to pick up their newspapers every morning.

Now, the whole Fleshlight thing, I obviously have something of an infatuation with currently. I do not own one of these amazing inventions – nor do I think it likely that I ever will… just based on the fact that I’m not the type who spends money on sex-toys, regardless of how fun they might be. Never the less, I have X-tube for the purposes of watching OTHER men enjoy their amazing cock-sleeve of joy. And all the power to them. Maybe once I’m rich from my practically invisible gay web-comic – I’ll worry about the frivolity of pleasure-toys… but until then, boys gotz’ta eat, yo.

In other news: I love my coffee shop. I love being able to sit and draw, chat with some very awesome baristas (baristi? baristamos?), and check out the man-candy sauntering about the place. Now, it’s obvious I don’t have a “classical taste” in gay men. Washboard stomachs to me hold no candle to a robust full-bodied barrel of a man… and damn if this state doesn’t have those in spades. So oft will I see the hairy bearded gent waddle to the nearest table and press ham to seat in a maneuver which displays more ass-crackery than this boy deserves. I need a better cell-phone camera to capture these moments in pornographic detail for these late nights at the computer.

And now, for the mental conflict of porn vs sleep…

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Discussion (13) ¬

  1. Dreamless

    Cool, fucking guy who knits gets a comic before me. Our friendship just died, I can totally have sex with an object with wayyy more enthusiasm then that fucking guy can. Your block value is through the fucking roof on this one.

  2. Head Artist

    Wow… this is awkward… I propose an inanimate object Fuck-Off! Or maybe a Fuck-a-thon, because that involves sponsorship…

  3. Dreamless

    I’m fucking a computer RIGHT now; I feel so aroused… but mostly regret. Call an ambulance.

  4. Genevieve

    well i’m NOT making burgers for dinner anymore…

    thanks Bob.

  5. Sultmhoor

    @Dreamless Oh, you’d be so in for it right now if I could find the link to the Fleshlight computer case mod… damn bookmarks getting lost!

    I taste better than monosodium glutamate, Accent! and Mrs. Dash put together.

  6. Head Artist

    Here’s a mod

    Not Fleshlight – but hey… whatever port in a storm, right?

  7. Glenn

    I have no problem with the various sex things people do to get off, but will the guy that lives across the way from me, when you’re doing that thing with the blow up sheep, can you please close your blinds?

  8. OsoTaino

    ow ow ow ow. can opener sharp edges. blood other things, not hamburger material

  9. Glenn Lee

    I’ve used a fleshlight before, it’s not really all that it’s cracked up to be. Since I’m uncut, my foreskin tends to get in the way after a while and really has the same effect as me pulling my foreskin over the head of my dick and just grasping my cock firmly which actually feels better than the fleshlight to me. Fleshlights are really an invention for people who’ve had their dicks butchered as a child.

  10. Gary

    LOL, maybe that explains why the crew at the new Five-Guys burger joints are so happy and the burgers so popular?!

  11. Travis

    Porn should always win that question.

  12. Peabody

    “Baristamos” sounds like an Enrique Iglesias song. Baristamos… let the coffee take you over, baristamos…

    I don’t own any sex toys, but I’m working on it.

  13. Bitch Wolf

    Hey, you can do a lot with groceries and creativity.

    But, second OsoTaino there. Ow ow ow ow. >_0

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